so heres a good story. about 6 hrs ago i took a bath with bruce blasting. and 6 hrs later i woke up still in my bathtub but in cold water
Why is there a cactus in the microwave?
Don't worry about it.
We have 10 gallons of home brew. And james has an amazonian blow dart weapon that sticks in bags and the wall. Come over
he's drinking beer at home in his underwear tonight and if you want to come over the dresscode is underwear only. And you have to bring beer.
Someone just told me I have an ass that could kill small children .... Don't know how to take that one
I knew you would eventually ask my secret. Pedialite mix drinks. Works wonders.
It's the building I live in, they were lucky I was wearing clothes at all
It was literally 8 o'clock in the morning. His horniness knows no bounds.
So I'll bring my machete and we can smoke your shit.
Out of context, that is a hilariously scary message.
I wouldn't hate if he could handle a sex only type of ship. I really don't want to use the word "relation" in front of that.
Can finally say I won't be lonely this Valentine's day! Mother nature decided to drop by.
So I fucked a guy with his mouth wired shut last night never thought id cross that off my imaginary bucket list
Dude!! Who the fuck glued Cheetos to my couch? Bastards!!
And you hate the library
Yea but I love drugs and my grades
He howled at the moon then told me that if i were a dog he'd have sex with me...either i look like that girl or i need to stop going on blind dates. Period.
Randomize
