Dont touch anything! You just got rid of your crabs!
that girl last night was a 15
wait she was 15?
no like black jack not sure if you should hit it
I just packed a bowl in my room and use glad press n' seal to cover it so it wouldn't dump out in my pocket .
Im in his room watching him sleep. Im going to try and jerk off and not get caught by the nurse.
Just abandoned him for a bowl of soup and the living room floor...hope the window replacement guys don't get a show..I miss you!
You're on Grindr at the STD clinic. I love you.
Also 70% sure I have a splinter on my eyelid from last night
I also turned off the Anchorman DVD start menu before cause I didn't want Will Ferrel watching me lose my virginity.
If I come in tomorrow with a cane and a seeing eye dog it's because I just mixed up my salicylic acid acne stuff with my eye makeup remover
Other than trying to finger me on the couch in the middle of the bar a few times, you were fine.
I've seen too many dicks in the past week. I can't do it anymore.
she's a drunken disney princess. so basically me if i had a crown and no desire for independence.
He said we had an hour long conversation about how awesome I was.
No idea who's grandma but people were just running around naked
Hhhaaa He said Peanutburter disinfect lol. Like peanut butter can disinfect stuff. None of those guys are safe
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