By the way the fattest man alive got married yesterday and I don't even have a boyfriend.
I'm not going to blow you while you look at fish on the internet.
She has 2500 facebook friends. I probably should have used a condom.
just bought a $25 eighth from a chick who has a kid. i'm helping my community out right?
so today in my theology class we brought up the proper way to have sex. so rough sex was said by the teacher...I said I know a girl that likes to be choked. sorry but everyone knew it was you
Text me back. Urgent. It is a porta Keep the portal alive.
Is this the acid talking?
Nothing says "future AA member" like bonging 40's out of a plastic flamingo.
YOU WILL DIE AND I WILL CARVE 'I TOLD YOU SO' ON YOUR HEADSTONE
I'm still a bit day drunk and decided to go for a run. You may get a snapchat of me vomiting soon
You kidnapped her dog. I don't care that you and the dog are epic bros, that's just not cool. Return him.
I have bits of ceiling fan all over now
learning about efficiency and effectiveness in an administration seminar. real world application: walking across the street to the pub on break to shotgun a beer.
I dont even remember what i was saying but just one minute i was crying and the next i was showing u my genitals
I drank all the wines... and all th Doritos. Whilst watching Fat Camp. I need to reassess my values.
OMG WE ARE UP TO THREE MINORS WORKING HERE. I AM NOT READY FOR THIS MID LIFE CRISIS.
Randomize
