You are missing out on the best boobs in town right now
So apparently when he was telling people he was in Alaska for 6 months he was actually in jail
Already puke and ralleyd and dressed like a bear.
I actually want to hang out with her with our clothes on. That's a big step up for me.
My glasses are somewhere in your living room. Also, my underwear might be in your bathroom or on or around your porch. Sorry.
Stripperoke is exactly what it sounds...
I'm about to play Thunderstruck by myself, that way I'll always get the long thunder part.
I honestly wish you had parked the car in the terminal garage and fucked me in the backseat but I guess I should be more forward
I let a guy with dreads drive my car, then demanded he take me back cause I don't let strangers drive my car, while repeatedly apologizing for being a cock block.
You. Me. Frosting and a bed. Lets do this.
I don't know where he learned to eat pussy but I thought I was going blind
I think it's time for a new pick up line. So far my " hey you want to go back to my place, order a pizza and fuck?" Has set me at an all time low downtown 0/4
Next time, dont ever let me talk to a guy drunk, especially if I have class with him the next day
Who do you have class with??
The guy that pulled down his pants in the middle of the dance floor to show me his tattoo
I am the worst person to have nipple rings I'm hanging ornaments off of then and sending everyone a tits the season to be jolly
By talk things out did he mean have passionate angry sex?
Randomize
