So I fucked an Aussie broad with huge feeders last nite 2x... Before banging her she was blowin me & I thought: "SHE IS GOIN DOWN-UNDER ON ME". Laughed out loud
Is licking assholes a new fad or something?
ok please explain why some one shaved half of my pubes?
everytime someone would look at you, you started to try and deep throat your beer bottle.
I didn't want to walk to anymore parties because I found a cat. It was magical.
With a stable of 7 fuck buddies, I literally use a random number generator to determine the order in which I will booty call them on my way home from work. I have not slept in my own bed in a month. I just keep half my clothes hanging in my car or in a suitcase.
It was all fun and games until she said "you're so pretty I wanna punch you in the face" and the proceeded to punch her in the face
Don't be the guy that has his dick out at work.
good news: i got laid. bad news: by your boyfriend
For a guy who won't fuck me, your dick is out a lot when we talk.
Oh god. Charles just fell off the bar. Didn't spill his drink. He's come so far..
I just saw elmo dancing with gumby. The bars at 7a.m. are AWESOME.
No idea who's grandma but people were just running around naked
there were rolls with just one bite out of each one leading to the bedroom. you were laying on the bed naked and yelled 'you did it you followed the bread crumbs!'
No one can touch me, I'm made of fruit.
Randomize
