great time with ya sorry i wasn't one of the three guys you wanted to stay with
pedialite and red bull = repair kit
Dude give me 4 good reasons we shouldn't trade girlfriends tonight
He's more than prepared to help us move. Dude brought sunscreen, cans of Coke, and Captain Morgan.
Ive seen him cuddling a giant inflatable seahorse. Nothing could be creepier than that.
somehow he and i always have our deepest conversations after phone sex.
Um, you were throwing up the shocker symbol in front of all of the wedding guests during the best man's speech. No wonder the groom thinks we're bad
Just had an hour long talk with a woman, turns out she's the mom of the guy i lost my virginity to. Even better his dog was also present.. Meeting the family at its best?
ARE YOU THINKING VAGINA THEMED RESTAURANT
I had sex on a dinosaur comforter, tell me that does not define my life.
I think we need to stage an Intervention. Her Instagram is a call for help.
He fell backwards into a full bathtub but didn't spill a single drop of the beer in his hand. What a pro.
I walked into my house with my pants inside out, no shoes and a limp. My mom asked me if I had fun but I passed out before I could reply...
The fact that he quoted freebird as his breakup speech was a little more classy than expected
I'm the only person I know that carries solo cups, shot glasses, ping pong balls, two decks of cards, and a lawn chair in his trunk. I'm ready to turn anything, anywhere into a party.
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