I actually told the people in the movie theatre to give me a cup and I would dip water from the toilet before I paid $4.50 for a bottle of water.
you opened the fridge, pissed on the food, fell over, then threw up on yourself. thats whats all over the kitchen.
so this guy comes in from the patio covered in puke and says "we gotta go"...Yup u need to go is an understatement
we saw a llama on the side of the road. That's when we knew everything was going to be alright.
My contribution to the dinner party was a bottle of vodka and a bag of uncooked potatoes. I felt like a Russian serf.
Every grown women needs to pee herself once in her life. It builds character.
Apparently it's bring your ugly annoying ass piece of shit slob of a baby day at work
I can smell the sangria seeping out of my pores
....she made me stop for like 3 minutes so she could talk to her cat....
I don't trust a bar IN TENNESSEE that doesn't have Jack Daniels.
she used her teeth again, but this time it was out of love
At about 2:30 i found you passed out in my closet with your face covered in cheese whiz
Cheyanne in woods. Ducks attacked. My toe is bleeding. We are gpsing our way home on foot. No worries
I'm on someone's yacht. I don't know who. But I'm on it. There's a guy passed out in a kilt holding bagpipes. Help.
Its like Gods punishment for wanting to party
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