They left shortly after you claimed the dirty rug as your mattress and began alternating between singing "Dayman" and "Nightman"
He literally had no idea who I was, so he made me turn around 360 degrees and when he saw my ass, he blurted out my first AND last name.
All his texts have the signature of a date with a smile. I asked him what it means. IT'S THE DAY HE QUIT DOING DRUGS
Also...you were trying to touch his balls without him noticing
Food Network. Taking bong rips everytime we want to eat. BOBBY FLAY.
who has not yet felt my sugrcially enhanced boobs. HurryI am at the bnar and it is 1:15 am
Woah there. I lasted a semester and a fourth of college not having sex. trust me when i say keeping my virginity was an obstacle course of olympic proportions.
The virgin olympics. I would win the gold. For America.
When he sent me a picture, I swear my vag frowned. That tiny.
DISHONOR ON YOU. DISHONOR ON YO FAMILY. DISHONOR ON YO COW
You brought string cheese to the strip club
I was basically just fingering myself and thinking about space.
I was supremely disappointed in the lack of dick and doughnuts in my life last week.
It was a successful conference for my sales and my sex life. Those are probably related
As long as it's more "this is where i see an issue" vs "psst.... tiddies" then i have no argument
Cancel your plans for the fourth someone is streaming iron chef on twitch
Randomize
