So now everyone thinks I don't know what a condom is
Apparently I was trying to convince him Springsteen has had buttsex. I ended the argument with "I bet he came from it too."
I know everyone screamed lady cop instead of cops. I wanted to apologize to her for our chauvinism
her boyfriend dumped her for my exgirlfriend. so filming our hookup is pretty much a definite.
i told you that I felt like my feet were melting into the ground and you starting blowing on them to put out the "invisible fire". thanks friend.
I can't keep up with all the guys you're banging. I'm just going to start referring to them by city of origin.
I just remember her dragging me inside in a panic saying we needed mentos and popcorn I have no fucking clue how we ended up asleep in her closet.
You're lucky you got out when you did, about an hour later the girl in the Franzia box started wrestling everyone.
When do you want to get tanked and forget our entire college education?
he had shaved armpits. I repeat: HE SHAVED. HIS. ARMPITS! First hookup of 2014 and it's with a weirdo. Alcohol:1 Me:0
National champion athletes like gay butt sex, too. I'm just here to help them out.
The thing about pooping in the woods during hunting season is you never know if someone's watching you.
BUT I'M ALSO ONLY IN IT FOR SEX AND HE CAN'T EVEN GET THAT PART RIGHT.LIKE LITERALLY ALL HE HAS TO DO IS DICK ME DOWN AND BE A DECENT HUMAN BEING IS THAT SO HARD TO ASK?!
If my one night stand asked me to move in with him right after does it still count as a one nighter?
She really wants to hug you. With her vagina.
Randomize
