we dont know what were doing after yet. first up we have 90 beers and a party kit and fun hats.
After we did it I noticed she was wearing the same underwear as last night.
That's why you don't sleep with the same girl two nights in a row man!
I'm sober in pajamas at a bar. Nothing is ok about that statement.
Some rando is vomiting profusely into the garden outside the employee entrance. Where are you when things like this happen to me?
Vomiting outside the employee entrance
She wants to have naked weekends
They call that free range vagina in France
You can't start the super bowl without starting a kitchen fire making cole slaw. Its unamerican.
I don't even want to know
So I think I might just embrace the awkwardness and say he fingerblasted her cause thats the greatest word in existence
Threw up on the baby. National Tequila Day is the eve of National I'm A Horrible Nanny Day.
he said he was going grocery shopping but when he came back all he had was a jumbo bag of pancake mix and case of beer.
the essentials, lol
I've found my spirit animal. I'm a Snapple bottle. If you take my top off I'll tell you a fact about science.
I can't. I'm going camping this weekend. I do have a life outside of your dick.
Pretty sure I got pink eye from the strip club. There is also still beer cans rattling around in my shower.
I'm bringing pajamas, aspirin, morning after clothes and morning after pill
How do I un-spend everything I bought last night? Seriously...was a penis shaped piñata and enough tequila to fill my bathtub really that necessary?
At least you can say you've literally dumped money down the drain
My brain is a dvd screensaver and I'm allowed to have a good thought when it hits the corner
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