I'm surprised I didn't puke tonight
If no ones going to say it, then I will. Vanessa Hudgens boobs are weird looking
Just watched Hilary Duff have a three-some on Gossip Girl...all I could imagine was that LIzzie Maguire cartoon girl freaking out above their heads
When i walked in, you were in bed with a hot chick rolled up in a green blanket and said you were acting like a caterpillar..
Not only do I have sand in my ass, but a crab pinched me while we were fucking. Still totally worth it.
Somebodaw call 311 postw fire bunso on vietena floorwnkd
Only thing I know is apparently I danced with a bouncer and we got a ride back from a valet who was driving one of the cars he was supposed to be parking
My stomach is revolting cause i have put food in it and no alcohol.
What! You have to go to class. Otherwise, you're wasting money that could have been spent on weed. Gotta get that shit in perspective.
Right when he asked me if I was on birth control my dad walked in. This is my fate.
WHO DOES THAT ON A TUESDAY? This is not a Drake joke, the girl doesn't turn up OR down. She doesn't do anything.
I just got called the stable friend. This makes me super uncomfortable
Whatever. I'll take my new fine ass dick sucking nails elsewhere.
I can't decide which is better: the sex, or remembering that I have ice cream in the freezer after he left
So I had Xanax for breakfast & I'm probably going to fuck my tennis instructor.
Randomize
