dude do u know what u did last night?
do i wanna know???
you totally walked in on some couple fuckin in their unlocked dorm room asking for directions to ur room...
I realize that when i start making 24-themed music videos in my head to the song 'love is a battlefield' that i really need to get out more
I plan on using my big titties for evil tonight.
If I had known I was gonna take my tights off and throw them over the balcony I would have shaved my legs.
Disney World has no open container laws. Ohmygod this place is even cooler than it was when I was ten.
Fact: my bamboo plant has grown 2 & 1/2 inches since I started watering it with bong water
hotel security told us you walked into the hotel with blood all over your dress, weren't wearing any underwear and were escorted back by three men who were believed to be "homosexuals".
Three guys came up to me at the bar and started dancing on me, while screaming "Johnson's girl." That's the last time I sleep with a freshmen.
I got home and laid by the toilet and then alexa laid in the bathtub and sang the preamble while kayla held my hair
I'm not sure if it was the 11 shots or your naturally vibrant personality but I recall you being quite noisy that evening
IDK DUDE BUT HE TIED IT WITH A SHOELACE SO I GOTTA FREE SHOELACE OUTTA THE DEAL. THIS GIVES A NEW MEANING TO LACED DRUGS
It's George Washington's Birthday. Can you not put on some red white and blue and get really drunk for the original Merican??
Well she started to strip and when she slung her hair at me, she painted my face with sweat. A LOT OF SWEAT. It was a weird boner.
You made out with him a lot. Almost as much as you told everyone Paul was the zamboni guy.
She said I can't embarrass her, the challenge has been set
Randomize
