it was like brushing your tongue but with a fucking long toothbrush.
I picked her up for our first date on a fucking horse. Of course I got a BJ.
Bad idea. College students cannot afford both alcohol and a cat. Unless said cat is irish, and can feed itself with fifths of whisky.
Do you remember using the heel of your shoe as a shish kabob stick? You offered me some chicken, but I declined.
I mean, we started to hook up but my asthma attack kind of killed the mood
Is waterboarding an exceptable way of getting sober?
He compliments me like a gay guy and fucks me like a starved nympho. I'm in love.
Nahh. Maybe not even a handful. It's more like a heaping teaspoon worth of dick.
your bra might or might not be a decoration on me and my roomies xmas tree haha
Update is I am officially king of Gettysburg. Tam and I are being threaded like royakt. In bought e ruined a drink
Why do I always end up with closet ICP fans?
Friends don't let friends go vibrator shopping alone.
I had to hose off vomit off my driveway at 9 am.....so hot
I just want a guy who makes lots of money, has a skilled penis and the sex drive of a 22 year on Viagra. Is that too much to ask?
I only gave you one rule about using the beach house: don’t get cum on anything!
You’ve seen my tits! You had to know that rule was unrealistic! Does it help that he was really cute?
Randomize
