i just google imaged poop.
I've seriously contemplated telling him the baby isn't his just so I can meet Maury Povich
It could have went better. They kicked us out of the casino and I drunkenly whipped her across the face with a fishing pole. Long story.
He spent 6 hours at the ER after crashing a motorcycle and still came to the bar, Ofcourse I went home with him. He's my hero.
there's no excuse to just assume your pants won't be coming off for some reason or another. that's just irresponsible
he just hooked up with some chick in a bedroom upstairs so I just went to sleep in the pantry closet...
Casually on the bus at 830 in the morning with a box of cheezits and a bottle of fireball sticking out of my purse....
i wish i could tell my students that all of their lessons plans were brought to them by captain morgan and diet coke. it's like seasame street, only for high schoolers being taught by a student teacher.
Back. Waiting on Thong the shuttle bus driver. THONG
He texted his hospitalized grandma while inside me, so really a perfect gentleman.
Yeah i like want to be friends with him. And if we have sex in the physics library well thats fine with me
UGH I HATE BEING THIS WAY IM GOING TO GO HUG THE CACTUS YOU GOT ME
I don't even think NICOLE made a fool of herself last night...
your aware she lit herself on fire, right?
I'm pretty sure my calc professer is on coke. He's just too excited for this to be an 8am class.
I love you so much and not just because your dick is perfect
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