hows the new call of duty?
I only had sex with the game case so far, but that part was awesome.
I remember coming home with a cat... I havent seen it all day. Shit.
well considering we left the bathroom with the mirror off the wall, a bloody nose, and clothes all messed up they assume im just a coke whore now..
This is me reassuring you that I'm still alive and making sure you still are.
She just referred to her vagina as "this bitch".
I will cut you
Oddly enough thats the second time today someones said that to me
Put that in perspective
if I just puked into my own hand, but then cleaned it up quickly, quietly, and calmly, am I still a trainwreck?
Dude, you were tagged in a stripper FB selfie. That is a whole new level of something.....
A 3am FaceTime to go to IHOP is the closest thing to a bootycall that I'm getting
yeah, i'm probably gonna die. still gonna be totally worth it tho
I walked in on a circlejerk after punching that guy out. Instant karma.
I'm at forever 21 and someone pooped in the dressing room.
You're a problem for me, dick game too good. In the future when I'm with someone I actually wanna to date, now I'm gonna compare.
just woke up with a trucker hat, half a grilled cheese, and popcorn spread everywhere. last night must have been good.
Just to let you know we went to the circus yesterday...in case you didn't remember
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