Everybody was literally kung fu fighting
College is just filling the gap until I get a rich girl pregnant
Dude i'm seriously thinking about his nipples.
Can you do me a favor and fuck someone with a car so I can get a ride home?
I actually enjoy jerking off to her facebook more than I enjoy actually fucking her. Just something with our generation
found a cell phone. in the freezer. wrapped in bologna. explain?
In mid-threesome, need more condoms. Wearing a sheet to the gas station. I'll keep you posted
it is a toga and you are a goddess.
How the fuck did you end up in a tree? With multiple people?
It was over as soon as he asked if he could name my vagina pancake.
after giving head I just always feel like I need like. ice cream. as both a means of getting the lingering sperm out of my mouth, and a congratulations.
just once I'd like to not pass out before we leave the designated pre-drinking place
How the fuck can he download so much porn but not know how to find the Skype app?
He sends me pictures of his dogs and I send him my tits, it's a win win situation
That awkward moment when you're drunk enough to crave cocaine, but you're sober enough to know it's only Tuesday.
How did I get up here...did jesus lift me up
Randomize
