Yeah I guess I was Pocahontus. If she were a trifling drunk who hung out in her undies, with possible brain damage.
Went to bed at 4 in a strangers bed. woke up wearing scrubs, realized i was gonna be late for work so i just wore the same clothes as the day before... i don't have a toothbrush and im pretty sure there is leftover semen in my mouth. at some point i think i was at the beach cuz theres is sand in my underwear. i love newport already.
I woke up covered in my own vomit with a pocket full of napkins. I guess I knew I would need them, but was not coherent enough to use them before passing out.
Just met a female bro. Things are weird at the rugby party.
As a matter of fact you told me i fulfilled your "woodshop teacher fantasy"
I'm blaming hurricane Irene if I get pregnant tonight.
Apparently I was the fucked up drunk guy greeting people at the hotel in the lobby last night.
i just remember explaining why my socks were better than everyone elses.
Ugh I just wanna make an announcement like: Attention high school classmates: if we haven't spoken in 5 years, we don't need to start now. Please be on your way
THIS NIGHT WILL NOT GO DICKLESS
I was able to hide the fact that I had just shit in my pants, and then wupped her ass at FIFA
He put a canoe in the lazy river at the water and started paddling away from security
just for future reference, lake water is NOT mix for hard stuff. nor is it an adequate substitute.
I threw up in a flower pot outside the bar last night and have a date tonight....I think I missed something
I love that you put so much thought and effort into your nudes
I don't send half assed nudes. Go big or go home.
Randomize
