they just came back. i guess "were gonna go get dinner" means "were gonna fuck for 5 minutes at the little league field"
You litterally reached into some girls shirt, pulled out her tit and yelled whats up with this guy.
I just saw a like a 30 person deep walk of shame... it was like the million man march but with dorm chicks
I have minimal recognition and a lot of burns on my tongue and my vagina hurts.
Im pretty sure you told the waiter at Dennys last night to take your pants off or show a nipple.
Im just saying it can't be that bad if he drove himself to the er. We'll head that way when we finish playing scattergories
I guess I was trying to make a cheese sandwich, I had to change my sheets cuz I slept on it and the cheese melted all over me, Dave, and my bed
Just living on dreams and a bed of used condoms
It's always great when the guy I get pills from sends me an email that says "I know you will get clean it's going to be hard but I know you can do it"
I just look at my butt and see so much potential.
There was a clear and well defined point last night where I could've decided to go home but no now I've woken up with glitter all over my nuts and potentially an std or 2
Talked to the dude for a hour . I now know where he lives, his occupation, his goals, his dreams and what his dick looks like.
Please don't finger me like a jackhammer. I'm a woman not a construction site.
Remind me later when I want to buy more drinks that there's a 20 in my bra
As you were falling you yelled out, "save my burrito!" Priorities
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