when a 14 year old is judging you, you know you've had too much to drink
he asked if he could put his cape on while he was still inside me.
The handjob she gave me was better than the best blowjob I've ever gotten.. Just imagine the possibilities.
just when i thought i had forgotten how badthe sex was he comes across campus solely to say hi
just did a beer bong in the shower while i was taking an actual shower its officially football time
I have no idea where I am, where my pants are, there is cheese stuck to my ass.. Why do I have your phone?
shot for shot with some guy twice your age to prove Detroit hustles harder then you left with him. We're tracking you
I think we should take up crocheing or stamp collecting....something completely lacking penises
I'm so glad we both made out with him though. I feel like that really brought us together
Either she's trying to smother me and failing, or she just has a really bad sense of where her tits should go.
Also I just took Ritalin with coffee so if anyone wants to know what numbers sound like, I got you
come over we're fb stalking guys who were dressed as bananas last night because i can't remember which one i blew
Is it bad that I tried to build an outfit based around "What do people who use condoms look like when they buy condoms?"
Some mornings I close deals. Other mornings I puke out my window while I’m driving down the highway
it's your last night here, let's make it one we may or may not remember.
I CAN’T BELIEVE YOU STUCK YOUR DICK IN CRAZY!
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