True true and the only thing that will burn more than the vodka we will consume is the shame in our loved one's eyes
And yet we make it a tradition to get inappropriately drunk at family functions. We amaze me.
At least it's not a funeral this time... I feel we're making improvements.
also. he gave me a foot massage during 69ing when i got a cramp. he's a winner.
i just saw that homeless guy who dresses like the cat in the hat at the liquor store. i guess he got enough change to have a good weekend. oh the places he'll go
I would have to gauge my vagina to make it fit.
There's strippers and bear every where so ether you gave me the wrong address or this is the coolest birthday party thrown for a seven year old ever.
Were going to have to vacuum the bathtub, great party
our flight took off 8 am and the bar didn't close til 5, so we decided it was a good idea to just stay out all night. Drunk logic is awesome. We were all scared we wouldn't get let onto the plane
At some point, it turned less into sparring and more into tough guy dry humping.
Everyone was soo nice and genuine.. Then again it coulda just been the drugs.
He drinks vodka like healthy people drink water and I wanted to have his adopted gay babies. That's all. I'm going to go find him and potentially propose.
You wouldn't believe how many pro-life stickers, and "show us your tits" signs there are between here and Dallas.
I've never had someone have to dis-arm themselves before I sucked their dick prior to that
he looks like the poster child for myspace how the hell does he have other hoes?
I want to start a guest book for my bed room so when dudes leave they can write a review
I just smoked weed out of a tomahawk, then chased an armadillo with said tomahawk, I love my life.
Randomize
