Oh my god he is having a sentimental moment right now.
He just sent me like a really heartfelt confession of love in which he ended with "make the apt, I'll hold your hand while you get your clit pierced."
i made two phi delts show me their dicks in less than 30 words! Take that twitter!
Too many people are naked here for this to be normal.
They were fighting, but then they bumped into the bong and it shattered. After that they just hugged and cried.
i secretly love the power trip of being their RA & busting these idiots for everything i did as a freshman
thanks for celebrating my birthday so severely 2 years ago. i just found your hospital discharge papers in my closet.
anything for my little brother.
You sucked on the drag queens heel. It got that rough.
Sorry I dragged you across a parking lot
She stumbled into class and Google image searched nipple piercings for the entire 75 minutes
I may have tried to encourage people to play a new game I invented last night. I called it Super Quarters. Like regular quarters, only using an AA medallion.
I'm not taking advice from anyone I've seen passed out naked at noon on the hood of a strangers car. Meaning you.
Well, after emptying the contents of my stomach into a fucking rose bush, the only things moving through my digestive system are pills, coffee, and my own lip gloss. If that gives you any idea what kind of a day I'm having.
I accidentally told my mom I broke my drug nail this weekend
We need to get walkie talkies for when we're drunk so if we are at different parties or lost we can talk
So i've noticed that drunk me erases sent messages to hide them from sober me, because drunk me knows that sober me will be PISSED at drunk me.
Randomize
