It's pouring out. I am cold, wet, and miserable.... Kind of reminds me of our sleepover last night.
U Should have said " it's ok baby most girls Sh*t when I do that.
I would drag my balls through a mile of broken glass to eat pudding out of her anus
She was ugly to the point i wanted to brush my teeth after looking at her
My facebook horoscope today said I will have a little "confusion". Obviously astrology understands a blackout.
I feel like I shouldn't be doing my banking stoned. But I bought a new bowl. Her name is Sharpe. Pronounced Shar-Pay.
At least the cops kept you away from sleeping with her. Protect and Serve.
there's fuck elsewhere to go, I'll be there with 8 lbs of bronzer on my tits
In his defense he just bought a bong like a week ago so he's still in that honeymoon phase.
I just watched my mom get dick on Skype.
That d should have definitely been an s.
Day 10 and still no sign of rescue in my pants.
He told me he loved me and then peed his own bed. So at least it was a memorable one night stand.
I met his parents. We played twister. My boob popped out.
Ugh I feel like I just got hit by a big giant sex bus.
i woke up fully clothed with teenage dream on repeat. something is wrong with me
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