Regardless thnx for trying to help out, I realize we are dealing w/ very stupid girls here
I can't believe the cop was so cool about the whole thing, I mean, I had man mayo all over my jeans.
I was just at the bank and there was a fat lady wearing a cape. today is gonna be awesome.
he sat in the bathtub shirtless yelling in gibberish for 40 minutes. funniest. stoner. ever.
i am breaking up with you. because you wash your hair too much and you only drink light beer and because you're not party enough.
Well I consider my vagina a dear friend. She treats me good I treat her good. We work together. Glad we could be of service.
we should look into getting a golf cart for the weekend. i have a feeling legs wont be a sufficient source of transportation.
When I woke up everyone at the party was in their underwear. Only you guys were playing strip pong.
Yes, we all have the power to convince a large amount of people to take their clothes off
It feels like New Years Day all over again...me trying desperately not to throw up in the backseat & mom and dad blissfully unaware in the front
oh I'm washing fake blood out of my bra.
I NEED to hang out with you more
I just had a twenty minute discussion about endangered breed dog breeding with an Extremely drunk guy
So many questions...
Worst wingman u don't do ANYTHING but laugh at my incompitant shyness
We aren't doing Shrooms tonight bc that would be friendship cheating on you
You tryed convincing the salvation army bell ringer you could do the worm and face planted into the sidewalk... I put a dollar in the can for your performance
I am watching Wayne Gretzky and Alexander oveckhin play video games for charity. What is life right now.
Randomize
