Oh, don't even get me started. Harry Potter is so pure. Twilight is just teenage girl porn.
planned parenthood is perfect for picking up chicks...they all put out
You put your red cup in a chain link fence and kept telling me you could use it as a telescope
how should i go about explaining the hickey i drunkenly gave myself last night?
What if we had a smart house and we could just say "baked" and it would rain donuts?
Girl passed out in class and vomited. Another victim of syllabus week
Im down. Even tho your nick name intimidates my vagina.
You coulda licked the floor this morning and got drunk.
His idea of role playing was him wearing the halloween mitt romney mask while I gave him head
Well I have rug burns in both armpits, somehow. So yes you should have been here
I'll pay you back with progressively deviant sexual favors.
If muffins & morning blowjobs don't make him happy, frankly, I don't think anything will.
Giiirrrllll. Back to back snaps of dicks. Two different guys sent me their dick at the same time. This is totally what our founding fathers meant with life, liberty, and the pursuit of happiness.
He wore a t-shirt that had an arrow pointing to his crotch and "DO IT FOR THE VINE" on it.
At least he's honest about how long he'll last.
Just found a rebirth in peppermint schnapps. May be able to stay up all night and finish this paper after all. MERRY CHRISTMAS
Randomize
