But i did once see a show where a women was homeless and installed a stove in a school bus so she and her baby could live there since all the seats were taken out. As far as being homeless goes it didn't look half bad...So this is me promising to you that if i ever am living in an abandoned school bus...i will at least pimp it out with a stove so you can come over for dinner sometimes
If a guy called my cleavage "mesmerizing" but is kinda related to me, does it still count?
So im going to watch Hocus Pocus in my footie pajamas... How am I in college?
I don't want to smoke with her when she's on adderall. She carved her pumpkin for four hours & didn't say a word.
I can't wait to be a mother. My daughters gonna outdrink every boy in her grade
But it's a terrible idea. One erection and it's gonna go wrong
I know it basically makes me the worst feminist ever, but I don't want to kill my own spiders. And I will pay my personal spider hit man with sammiches and unlimited , uninhibited access to my vagina.
I wish drunk me wasn't so into manscaping. Or at least good at it. Either or really
She's impossible to please. Other than with two fingers and a tongue.
Christopher Columbus didn't sail the ocean blue so I would have to go to class and not have sex with my boyfriend
I put his pb&j sandwich in my bra and never looked back
The UTI came back with a vengeance.
All my female reproductive organs were screaming HELL YES last night.
I can feel the shame as I walk down your hallway.. good night
Just waxed 95% of the hair off my vag. If he doesn't enjoy this tonight, you will, whether you like it or not.
Randomize
