i love that he's uncircumcised. it makes handjobs so much easier. it's the lazy susan of penises.
I imagine the nuva ring like a bug zapper. It just kills them all.
I don't want to talk. I just want to motorboat those tits
Maybe you shouldn't go to cosmic bowling, i don't know if cum glows and I don't wanna find out i'm sure his parents don't either.
you don't know what its like to have your bartender tell you that you owe him beer money infront of your mother at 3pm on a tuesday
I definitely did a line of something I don't know with a Pagan biker. I make good decisions.
Remember that time we got drunk tomorrow
your life is not complete until you watch a gaggle of murderous clowns dance to gangnam style.
also, what is the correct term for a shit ton of clowns?
If my vagina were a person, it just ran a marathon.
Why thank you for your unwanted opinion, person I've never met before.
Actually we have similar relationship styles aka no relationship... it could work
Had to admit my broken elbow was caused by vodka, not hockey
Lately I've been very attracted to Kevin Jonas because he's like...less hot than Joe, but he's this healthy mix of both Joe and Nick. It looks like he's finally growing into himself.
Just used a NyQuil cup to take a shot. This night is headed nowhere good.
She’s the kind of asshole whose face I want to put on a T-shirt just so I can go outside and burn it.
Randomize
