Two girls down stairs, two girls up stairs and....
We've got ourselves a situation
Not really fighting over the same girl. He takes her out to dinner and then I come over and fuck her. We've worked out the perfect relationship.
We must be getting old. All of our friends are having kids and they aren't illegitimate.
Mass Text: Free blowjob to first person to bring me a nacho cheese chalupa.
She fucked me for a ride to the airport. If this is what the rest of college is like, I'm never graduating.
Please acknowledge the sock on the door. If not it will be rammed up your ass.
I CAN'T DO THIS MUCH FABULOUS BEFORE LUNCHTIME
Seriously. Texted me 4 times and that didn't wake me up so he nicely called and left a voicemail saying he WOULD call me 8 times. So when he called back I answered.
If I am telling you about the details of the shits I take I probably don't want to have sex with you. Probably.
I just wanna get drunk and go sledding in my kayak
you don't even have a vagina so you don't get to tell me what to put in mine
It has now been 10 days since we last saw Sebastians penis
As a courtesy going forward if you could not bang in my house that would be nice
So you broke your ribs while fucking? Dude you just got about 25% hotter.
Preface: Im drunk. But i think id make a good assasin. That is all.
Randomize
