Would you object to my putting the bidet video on my Facebook page? It;s awesome.
So, just so you know... Your vasectomy worked.
bonus
I mean I'm not worried about us not getting wasted. I'm more worried that I'll be doing a Boris yeltzen impression by 1030.
Just now remembered singing Trashy Women at the reception. Not karaoke, just sang along with the mic I stole from the DJ. All while still in my dress drinking champagne from the bottle
Well you just missed the ten chi o pledges singing la bamba at our doorstep.
my first words to him the next morning were "do you like magic"?
Omg no. We ate a raw pumpkin last nighr. We dipped it in BBQ sauce.
Got head last night. Had the 3D glasses on the whole time.
Your stoned with a 2 year old in the room....and that makes you want to have babies?!
My night was too much. My morning is even more. Help. I need to teleport the fuck out of here.
I wore wrist and ankle weights while we had sex. Does that count as working out?
I can't tell if I'm still on the hangover from last night, or if I'm experiencing the one from tomorrow, because it was so powerful that it actually traveled back through time...
Ugh I don't want to adult today. I need like a dozen more coffees. Or cookies. They're interchangeable.
Also, we can't be seen together looking suspicious or sexually satisfied
We've been here for 9 days, so of course I am high at my in-laws' house.
Randomize
