your life is more of a joke than dina lohan.
if you\'re going to compare me please pick the classy one. Michael Lohan.
Is it weird for a girl to post pictures of her dildo no facebook?
Whenever ur ready we need breakfast and a psychic.
I'm buying a chandelier at walmart. WHO'S CLASSY NOW, BITCHES.
HOnestly. That's my one goal for this whole trip. I don't give a shit about souvenirs or sand. I want penis.
They showed a guy on tv in a Brady jersey and a sweatpants boner when the NE offense took the field. They didn't show his face. I hope that wasn't you.
Romantic bubble bath turned into splash war. We can't be adults about anything.
You were jumping on the trampoline and screaming that you couldn't feel the fire.
It's okay though. My mom didn't believe that they were mine cuz they were magnums. Having a surprisingly large penis ftw
SOMEONE has to puke in the potted plants at an Xmas party. As their boss I felt it should be me.
I am about to embark upon a south Boston wedding....
Hydrate.
I'm getting a car wash man. I am go get a car wash high.
please let it be arousing that I used numbers to figure out how well I'd give you head
All I know is if i get a free preview weekend of HBO then I am recording Kindergarten Cop.
I almost had sex at the fire station last night and I need you to acknowledge all the awesomeness that is in that sentence.
Randomize
