and you said cock pushups were impossible
so I think I'm done having sex with her, she's way too crazy
what about the blowjobs for adderall?
no those are still okay
they told you the "weed man" wouldn't come until you were asleep, like santa claus. you believed it.
two words: fractured penis. two more: emergency room.
she called me a fuckfaceshitdick. not that's creative. it sounds like a crayola crayon, preferrably an orange-brown shade.
If I get laid, we are framing that mattress and hanging it on the wall as the place we both lost our virginities.
By the power invested in me, I now pronounce your taco to be meaty. Meaty taco meaty taco meaty meaty meaty taco.
Ripped lines in the bathroom before my presentation.. Got bonus marks for my enthusiasm.. This is why I love drugs
Fortunately for myself I'm twice as smart and half as drunk as everyone else. All things considered I'm leaving here three-to-five times richer than when I arrived.
Its kind of weird knowing that im only seeing you that day to fuck in some woods
hey, being drunk and dumb is my thing. Don't take that away from me.
this is honestly why we're friends. we drink tea and plan to do drugs together.
Bro. I traded my coat. I have a Raiders coat now.
On the flip side, we did almost have sex wearing a gorilla mask and deer antlers.............
Of course I fucked him. He was wearing a rainbow cock sock and cowboy boots.
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