i wonder what barack obama's brickbreaker high score is...
remember the good old days of high school when a half gal would last for more than a nite
I definitely managed to work the word "aforementioned" into the conversation.. At least I'm an intelligent sexter.
You'd be amazed at how difficult it is to find pics of the helicopter dick
I am very proud of your internet skills
i can't invite random hot hobos into my aunt's house.
He can only pee with the faucet running. It's like I'm dating a fucking toddler.
When Pony by ginuwine plays I pretty much just grind on the nearest penis.
He came in two seconds and stole my pizza so I'm not counting it.
I wore a bathing suit downtown so I didn't have to put on underwear, I obviously don't have my shit together
My date ended with her leaving the bar with that guy who used to jerk off in the back of the school bus.
Your bf is wearing nothing but a cape, I mean absolutely NOTHING but a cape. I know you said he looks like Thor but this is getting a bit ridiculous.
Do you ever go take a shit and end up sitting on the toilet for like 45 minutes wondering what the fuck you're doing with your life?
Everyday my friend, everyday.
I HAD SEX WITH COLBY AND HIS FIVE YEAR PLAN IS TO STEAL A REALLY EXPENSIVE PAINTING AND ASKED ME IF ID BE INTO HELPING HIM AND I WOKE UP IN HIS BED TO A WOMANS TUBE TOP NEXT TO ME
you blew the guy with all the harry potter paraphanelia didn't you
You drank whiskey for 9 hours and did not eat anything.Nothing good was going to come from that.
Randomize
