its like randi wears special contacts, but instead of colors they make her eyes say "I want cock"
he was so high, he talked to my goldfish for an hour telling him the dangers of overfeeding.
this girl is having heart failure because she lost her feather...a gypsy blessed it in turkey. Not sure im high enough for this
I think he liked me better when I only opened my mouth to suck his dick.
it was like getting a handjob from robocop
Don't worry we did the "promise to get an abortion" handshake
And I don't know what it is about weed making me want every episode of the real housewives of everywhere
I'm sorry but I have WAY too many sex/ hookup related bruises on visible areas to be going home tmrw
The 4th is next week. If we don't get to a new level of high, we will be letting down George Washington.
Clothes make me feel like a responsible adult and that's just not something I'm ready to handle.
I was on tinder the whole time I was waiting for my pregnancy test results at the doctors.
They kept freaking out that you were missing and potentially having sex.. like it was a bad thing. Got fed up with hearing it so i just yelled "ITS HER BIRTHDAY AND SHE CAN FUCK IF SHE WANTS TO!" They gave me unnecessary looks. I thought it was acceptable.
Doing shots with my high school valedictorian. Bucket list
He pulled out the guitar, sat in tub, and took requests while she puked her brains out in the toilet. I think he loves her.
I was left to my own devices with nothing to do but drink
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