I just saw a kid drop his lollipop on the floor of best buy, kick it because he was pissed off and then pick it up and eat it. I think I have a long lost son.
we fucked while he was on the clock. He didnt even take off his bullet proof vest. Dont tell me thats not bad ass.
I just dumped out my gym water bottle and filled it with white wine. This is the end.
It was the third Sunday in a row that I woke up in his bathtub. So no our sex life isn't that great anymore.
Something about getting head on stairs. I don't know.
My last memory involves me naked in a mens's bathroom stall. I really hope my date was with me.
There are too many people and smells in this elevator for my hangover to handle.
i feel like the wall was a canvas for his penis.
Is "incoherent" a legit goal to strive for tonight? Or should I stay sober enough to fuck who I can?
I remember just enough about last night to wish I didn't remember anything.
Doing tequila shots with my ex to celebrate that we broke up... not awkward at all.
Would "deck the halls with penises " be an appropriate event title? I know peni is the plural but flow of the tongue as well
Cool. I might be making a sickly but incredibly well dressed wine drunk appearance in a couple hours
I swear he is my soulmate. He kept feeding me goldfish while we were fucking. Who wouldn't enjoy that while having sex.
You let the ASEXUAL teach sex Ed?!
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