did you make any bad decisions?
many, i pretty much fell in love with a freshman...it doesn't get much better than that
everytime i eat a fruit i feel like i'm eating ovaries
I had to fart so bad so i let it go hoping it would be quiet, it was loud and shit came out!!! and i couldnt leave because her parents were behind me
i may or may not have just grinded on your dog thinking it was my boyfriend
There is a girl in bio drinking beer out of a starbucks cup with a straw
She said her first boyfreind was so small she is still technically a virgin.
she stopped mid-blowjob to explain how to acheive the haircut shown in the movie
Believe it or not, Travis and I simultaneously breaking beer bottles over eachothers heads was not a good idea.
I just came so hard there were tears. Actual tears.
Ya well here is the deal with last night, it was the Biggest shit show we have ever co-stared in.
You told me to remind you that the bruise on your ass is from when you danced on the table at Ziggy's, saw a cop and tried to 'fly away'.
I woke up smelling like chlorine with a broke toe. They know how to fucking party on lake lanier.
I feel like I got ass raped in the brain.
It took years to build this empire of casual fuckings and not carings.
i would stab him if he didn't just tell me he is a priest
breakfast this morning: omelette, Valium and baileys hot chocolate
Now that sounds like the breakfast of champions
Randomize
