apparently i started the naked brigade. and depantsed everyone who wasn't naked. her parents must hate me.
You have more facebook pictures than most towns have people.
As im putting my laundry in the machine, i find a solo cup and a pong ball that i signed babe ruth
he was shitfaced drunk and couldn't walk but could still recite the top 10 in order from the first season of american idol. impressive
wait, how does the 20 year old one night stand pregnant girl have a superiority complex?
I made him say "i realize i'm cheating on my girlfriend" five times aloud before i would hook up with him. Somehow that has to lessen my bad karma
It was a perpetual wrestle for who got to be on bottom. Laziest hookup ever.
You drink it until you puke in a vent one time and it's ruined forever.
do u know what happened to the bottles last night?
apparently we hid them.... i google mapped the location into my phone
Like an undercooked grilled cheese that got cold again. But hairy.
And there goes my desire for sandwiches. Forever.
I'm glad our friendship can withstand laughing mid-blowjob during the diarrhea scene in Dumb & Dumber.
My poor liver. I drank enough on NYE to sustain an alcohol addiction for the entirety of 2015.
Your normalization of crazy is frightening.
I just gave him road head. He came in the Taco Bell drive thru which seems pretty typical for my life.
It was like Lady and the Tramp, but just tramp and the tramp. And instead of spaghetti and meatballs, we had whiskey and cups
Randomize
