Did you call me this morning? I was really drugged up and don't remember.
Have a good day. My vagina shrank.
I'm drinking reisling in a paper cup by myself in the garage.
i told him im from Canada, abortion is free
I went to his work to give him some blankets and ended up blowing him in the bathroom. See what happens when you don't come over?
I feel like we're taking advantage of the fact that our R.A has cerebal palsey.
Jesus once told his disciples that its better to hang out with your best friend than give some douche bag a bj.
For your information i will be shotgunning whiskey on may 21st.
This is probably the only time in my life I'm going to be able to say I'm going to the hospital too smoke weed and play Mario kart.
He wore my sunglasses on his honeymoon..... so there's that.
I'm shotgunning a 12 pack at a bus stop. This is why we pay the rent with an auto withdrawal at the beginning of the month
i spent 45 minutes yellng Heather I feel so bad i wanna die and then 45 more yelling I DONT WANNT TO DIE. thats how drunk i was
IM SO HIGH RIGHT NOW, IM WHAT ROCKET MAN WANTED TO BE WHEN HE GREW UP. ELTON JOHN CAN BLOW ME.
Also day 6: dick is healed and ready to go back to work.
Let's put it this way, there's not many girls I wouldn't let sit on my face
his mom walked in while he was eating me out. and my vag was facing the door. luckily his face was in it.
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