I feel dirty and I went home alone. Bars should be like airlines and make fat girls pay double for everything.
Ironically her ferret's toys look like her sex toys.....this is a whole new level of kinky for me
HAPPY NEWYEARSM FAGTRON! GETTING HEAD IN TAXI I WIN
WERE YOU GOING TO TELL ME THERE WAS A LOAF OF BANANA BREAD IN THE OVEN BEFORE YOU LEFT FOR A 5 HOUR SHIFT??
he will always be the guy i fucked in the hallway.
it's ok. he made up for it by standing there and holding my purse while i made out with three guys at the bar. it was a pretty good night.
in line at jewel. the cashier is puking in a garbage can while ringing up customers. glad to know im not the only one that 2012 is kicking in the face already.
therea a video of her dad walking in while i screamed "lets have a fashion show!" and fell off the table
I wore home his HoHoHo boxers. I've never felt such a connection to an article of clothing.
Yeah if I don't text back. I'm eating. sleeping. Or lifting. Or drinking. Or playing call of duty. Like shit man
Just FYI....you totally yelled out Royals while we were having sex last night lol.
Waking up next to a guy you don't remember going home with and the first thing you say is: where is my tiara? = successful birthday
Drunk me commented on almost all of her pictures. My favorite one is titled "be as the sea". My comment is "cold, rough, large and letting anyone come inside you. you accomplished." Guessing I'm not invited to the party anymore.
Steven and I talked about running for office again today. It's fucked that my 3 dream jobs are marijuana bakery owner, bar owner, and president.
Now I am free. And I want to go meet men. My phone deleted all my contacts, and I consider this to be a new beginning. With a new man in my phone book.
Randomize
