Just walked pass a bum on the way to a coinstar... awkward
The night ended with a lot of tears and everyone singing along to Willenium
i will trade you pizza and a blowjob for a fifth of vodka.
do i get to eat the pizza while you give me the blowjob?
Trying to figure out when's a good time to take acid and not tell anyone and see how long it takes people to notice
Didn't get the job. Searched for my references on FB and saw the pic of me weighing my head passed out.
There is a positive side to a sinus infection. Exclusively cowgirl sex. I've convinced her I'd pass out if I had to do the work.
Birthday are for suffering. TAke some tylenol pm and day-drink tomorrow
But college guys get to crossfade so there's that
No idea what that is
Like getting bent? When you drink and smoke together...
I'm 30 stop using your cool kids words
Dude you spoke to a girl about CRICKET. She MUST want sex
You know that you're in a bad spot when the doctor puts you on 500mg of amoxicillin 4 times a day for ten days and puts refills on it...
He's gonna do me a solid for doing her a solid. It's like pay it foward. But with sex.
6 hours ago I jacked off a a guy for $100. I explained it away as "compensation" for gas and tolls. WHAT am I doing with my life? Quickest and easiest $100 I ever made though, haha
Think of the things uve done in the past. And ask urself "have I done worse?" If u answer yes. Its perfectly ok.
got some info she was last seen with some guy wearing goggles
We have such a parasitic relationship. But the kind where the parasite benefits from the relationship. Like the pilot fish and a shark. The fish gets the leftover food scraps from the shark and the shark gets a free bath from it.
that's so insightful.
Randomize
