I totally thought the tree was playing the guitar
i really wanted you to get laid last night and i didnt think you were going to. so i posted porn on your facebook.it made sense at 3am
Just had another dream about being on Real Chance of Love. I think it's a sign.
i'm laying naked in your bed you should probably come home
move.
We're doing a case race on Saturday.
I'm in. I'm currently drinking a beer in the bathtub so I guess I can consider this "practice" and not just "alcoholism"
And all I wanted you to do is stand there and sing who let the dogs out.
I'm going to shower the piss off me now. I feel like I was in an R. Kelly dream.
driving home I had the GPS in one hand and puking in the coffee cup
So no more sangria road trips?
Let's go dancing. I wanna sprain an ankle. And a labia. My labia or yours. I'm not picky.
WTF moment this morning: we were getting ready to leave and he reaches under his mattress to pull out his gun. All I could do was look at him and go "really?!"
My friends got engaged today and I learned the techniques of going upside down on a stripper pole. I'm not really sure who won...
he was peeing off the deck shouting "urinals are for pussies" that's how much hurricane.
i had fun fun last night, with the exception of you running over my foot with your car. makes a great story for my first one night stand.
you said you were the change fairy and you kept throwing all of your quarters at me.
...blackout vacation is awesome. Where did you end up? I think i'm in Miami.
Hospital.
Randomize
