dude can i febreze my hair or is that slutty?
I wish I has some fucking Fairy God Parents, I want a kit kat so bad.
She was wasted. Kept yelling "what if I'm pregnant" and trying to push me into the tree. First and last time I bring a girl to my family christmas party.
man i wonder what i would be like if i had never started smoking weed
when we asked you if you had had anything to drink tonight you looked up from the toilet while cupping the water into your hands and said "this.. just this"
Man, the last time I saw you you were giving me a thumbs up while being pulled out the bar by your belt from some girl.
I'm just high and in my robe and I would suck a dick for some pizza rolls. I can't talk about your problems right now
Just explain how I got from the bar to a house I've never been in, waking up to a cop in uniform ripping a bong
He put those pics of him with those girls on facebook and tagged his wife in them
Tequila 1 marriage 0
Dinner at 5, shrooms at 10.
I woke up with a twisted ankle and was covered in lube. Not entirely sure what happened last night
he told me he liked me . I thought we were just fuck buddies . This ruins everything!
I'm stuck on a cliff. I'm not sure how I got here or how to get down. Please send help. And clothes.
I just gave a fucking twenty minute blowiob.. I'm a GOOD girlfriend.
That was the first time ive ever slept with a girl with a q in her name
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