i tried to light my apt on fire. reasons why drunks and women should not cook
Is it bad that when I see ugly people make out, I hope he's impotent?
i cant believe jose lima did steroids
apparently the kind that make you shitty at baseball
you busted in the room, ripped the covers off of us, ... and fist pumped
So for a second i just thought clitoris was a disease.
im still trying to figure out who put the honey mustard in the blender then put the entire blender into the freezer
dude i woke up sitting indian style with my face on the ground and my hand in a bucket of ice.
Please tell me this is my four loko that I just woke up in....
I automatically know you're drunk now as soon as you start yelling in spanish
should I tell them that both of them had sex with me last Saturday? it might be a relationship builder type of thing you know?
I think I used my hospital ID to cut the coke last night. I need to swab it for residue at work today.
you just have the mind of an innocent, non-tainted child.
YOU KNOW THAT'S BULLSHIT BECAUSE YOU'RE THE REASON IT'S BULLSHIT
We do have a rich storied history of emotional warfare
Yes please. My parents would fucking love him and I'd love fucking him. That's a win-win if I've ever seen one.
Who is naked dude in the kitchen?
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