I just wiped my vajayjay with snow. Bad idea.
I just had to google "How do I get semen stains off of drywall." I'm relatively proud of this
next time the cops show up in riot gear we should probably leave
and miss being on the news....no way
this study room smells like vodka
the study room thinks the same about you
just to let ya know we might have to take a stripper snowboardin sometime
So i think i'm going to frame my summons tickets and give them to dad as a christmas present...
They wear helmets and mouth pieces when they drink...u down?
Bring beers. The password is "I brought beers" but you can't come in if you're a liar
We fucked like animals and then decided we actually liked each other so then we made love. It's a match made in heaven.
well a fat roach just fell out of my hair. so there's that
well at least now you can say you got an STD from the frontman of a band no one's heard of
fuck you.
maybe one of us should just pity fuck him and get it over with.
So i came so hard i almost passed out, where has this vibrator been all my life?
This is why I only drink in places with a C or D health rating
did you call me last night and say you were being kidnapped?
Randomize