Dude, she introduced me to her best friend form Russia and she was a 10. Her other Russian friend was even hotter. How did communism fail?
it got awkward when the only couple not hooking up was just watching..
like when he blacked out and we found him in the garden eating your tomatoes off the vine
I was trying to be an adult about it and simply deal with the situation, but a bowl seemed much more comforting.
im still going. this is my new reality. also. dont take glowsticks in the bath. they explode. actually. do. it. its beautiful.
i dont think thats healthy man...
I don't know which part of you thought this was funny but it's fucked up to wake up in that much fluff and now we don't have a couch. Fuck you.
I'm using her two yr old as a arm rest while I attempt to feel her up. Somehow she is allowing it. How this transitions to sex should be interesting.
It's a journey
And the destination is his penis?
Precisely.
Went to 7-11 to buy condoms with the $20 I found on the ground outside Rite Aid. A good day for drug stores
I think he might be using me for sex. I also think I might be ok with that.
I'm twenty nine years old, now is not the time to start trying new drugs. I need a hedge fund...not another drug-induced hangover.
I literally JUST MADE IT to the liquor store. I bought a box of wine with the lights off
My dick has been in way too much crazy the past 2+weeks, but hey it feels good to fuck consistently again
What the hell kind of sad excuse for a bottom are you
Visiting my great uncle went well. The highlight of the evening was when he said, "Oh my god. I'm 79 and I'm teaching 18 year old kids how to roll a joint."
Randomize
