Ever since I discovered that youporn works on blackberry, my brickbreaker skills have gone to shit
you kept typing in answers.com, why are the state police calling my house, expecting an answer
Lesson Learned this Week... If it seems too good to be true he is probably just trying to get you pregnant.
Dude, didnt you only know that guy for a month and he is demanding offspring?
Apparently, at this age my womb is an early conversation
If I had a clone, I'd fuck it with a condom
Just made out with the bride... She was still in her dress & I was still in my bridesmaid dress, how's that for an album picture?!?
I know eh? If a man wants to pay 7 bucks to see some boobies he should be allowed to do so in peace.
Idk we were snorting lines and making out in the stall while these people were cheering us on, on the other side. And that's when I realized he wasn't the only guy in the girls bathroom.
So, I'm drinking, and I put my head down in the table. The cat jumped up to check on me, I have a cat sober monitor.
Fate is real! that hot chick, Megan just showed up dressed as jasmine and I'm dressed as Aladdin this is going to be cake
I wonder if a fish could survive in vodka
I could
I need more social interactions that don't involve sex
he stole a smokey from the street meat vendor and put it in his pocket when she wasn't looking and now we're drinking avocado margaritas
I will have to bone him sometime between now and July so he will move all my shit again
honestly if there were pictures of last night i would be embarrassed.... im embarrassed without pictures
Omfg 7 hour sex session who am I?
PS: I think I'm in love
Ability to walk tomorrow tbd
Randomize
