yo I wanna see you, bring that beard of yours
oh no, I think we did it in the 'front asshole'
I was so drunk last night I wanted to download a Busta Rhymes album.
I'm officially my mother.. Smoking in the garage pretending to take the dog out in a big ugly jacket
Thank God. You really dodged a small penis there.
a price tag just fell out of my vag. i guess its worth $13.99...
Things I woke up with this morning: half a mcmuffin, orange hair, one shoe and a friendly german man. Tequila was a brilliant idea.
We had to leave after he was in the middle of the street yelling "Balls of Steeeeeeeeel!!"
I think we need to teach you what straight means again
We are going to the humane society and getting you microchipped so you don't get lost on your birthday. Either that or your getting a child leash
"He was so not worth staining my backseat for."
I think she tried to suffocate me with her tits...she almost succeeded.
You know more about his cock specs than his childhood. Proud of you
nothing like a long car ride to make you think of all the bad things you've done
Don't get mad at me now, you have my car and all the doughnuts
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