in the car goin home for fam dinner and he is silent... i think he realized how big of a whore his little sister is
her boobs were like sundried tomatoes..
You really need to take down the pics of you and your boyfriend on facebook. It's becoming increasingly harder to jerk off while i'm Facebook stalking your pics at 2am.
You were so drunk that some guy dressed as Harry Potter pointed his wand at you and screamed "Accio SHITSHOW"
It was like little house on the drunk prairie.
This was all being yelled across a beer pong table as all important things should be discussed
It's too hard to jack off and hold an ipad at the same time
we flagged you as soon as you tried to put the lime in the microwave to prove it was really a kiwi. again.
It wouldn't have been a big thing. If anything, I woulda apologized to you and cleaned the remote
dude chill. we stole 18 hamburgers from her house
no. you cant fuck a burger.
It's taking 3 penises to fill the hole he left in my heart.
I normally need adult supervision or a babysitter, but I refuse to let someone keep me from making irresponsible and wrong decisions at the bar on my last bday ill ever have in texas
Omg this is like trying to sleep on a pile of ballsacks.
Dude, I woke up with wet dollar bills in my boxers where did you take me???
You were only speaking with either thumbs up, thumbs down, or high fives haha
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