Are you guys doing anything tonight?
Krysta
i've decided to use this saturday afternoon to take care of my pube situation
Even tho I saw his penis. He is still a really nice guy.
I saw him on the jumbotron, its like god doesnt want me to forget his tiny penis
gave you a haircut while you slept. Please don't kill me.
I just kept pointing at random people and telling the bartender to put it on their tab.
I feel like a squirrel prepping for the winter on dollar beer nights.
I thought the cops would know I was on shrooms because I was 10ft tall.
I made everything so magnificently awkward in under 15 seconds. I am magic.
Cool. I might be making a sickly but incredibly well dressed wine drunk appearance in a couple hours
Oh by "being festive" I mean make tacos for dinner.
I remember walking into a bathroom stall that had a couple fucking in it and giving them a condom and a thumbs up and then leaving
At least I’m an “essential employee” and can still bang my boss. \n\nFingers crossed my husband doesn’t ask why I’m essential, the orgasms are too good to give up during this pandemic
she's 6'2. you bet your ass i slept with her.
Who the hell tries to steal eggnog.
Randomize
