More tranny stories later!
And. No one ejaculated on anyones face. This is all wrong
getting caught by my parents in bed with another guy was way easier coming out than telling them over dinner like I had planned.
I keep finding coffee grounds in my vagina
I envy the lives of milf's kids, the little kid grabs her tits and she just laughs and says not now
I was so drunk that I didn't realize he was staying at the Waldorf. I walk of shamed the Astoria, do you even know what this means?
I think I used your jacking off shit when I showered. I couldn't see shit, it was all oily. Fuck power outages
So the contents found in my winter coats this year: coat 1, condom and 10$. Coat 2, condom and 75$ check. Coat 3, 2.05$ and a sunflower seed.
Obviously coat 3 had the best time since you used the condom and all of the money
It's supposed to be a shit show, it's an end of the world party.
Went into Walmart to get a pregnancy test. Came out with a beta fish and chocolate.
Full disclosure. I fucked the fatty from work and shit is weird now.
We were all day drunk by 2pm. Now I know why they hate Americans
Despite breaking my phone, thumb, and my dignity, last night was pretty good.
Your slutty phase was the highlight of my year.
I guarantee you he will only fuck with old bitches from now on
Randomize
