Listen the way I know if I'm drunk is if I have stage fright in the pisser if I do then I'm not drunk! And I definitely still do right now!
I'm blazed at jack in the box and my order number is 420. I wish everything in the world made this much sense.
I'm afraid my bank account can't handle syllabus week.
WHAT THE FUCK. SUCH A BAD IDEA. YOU'RE NO LONGER IN CHARGE OF NOSE SUBSTANCES.
DR UNK TOWN USA
TEAM USA GO AMERICA
PLAN B IS EXPENSIVE ON A $50 A WEEK BUDGET.
So I'm thinking that so long as I have this piercing, I'm going to get tested for explosives at the airport
No! Last time I got hit with a beer bottle
Haha, Tuesday man
its not like i called off work either time for the purpose of tripping, it was more like well, i have nothing to do now today, there is acid and im only human.. but twice
Is it too early in the day to be getting dressed for the strip club?
You know what? The sex was so bad that I don't even care that I gave him strep.
He wants to tie me naked and spread out on his table, press a vibrator to my clit and feed me ice cream.
That is my stoner wet dream!
I already left my house once this summer. Maybe we could do something in October.
So not only did I get laid today but I also left with a 42” tv lol
the fact that your 21st birthday is also new years eve is pretty much a death sentence
Randomize