Apparently every Tri-Delt knows what I did and I am blacklisted from ever dating anyone in that house.
Well ya you lied, told her you cared, took her virginity and then broke up with her at Christies Toy Box.
I honestly thought the dildo was a nice parting gift.
You know, if there were no such thing as marriage, i don't think porn would exist.
it was funny though when you first woke up you pointed at my shoe and said i need my jacket and then put my shoe on your hand
He told me he had an exgf. and didnt follow up with"and now i like guys."
we've progressed from teabagging to lighting eachothers asses on fire. this cannot be a good path.
I just remembered I gave $20 to a bum last nite. Philanthropy events always make me do stupid shit.
The fact that its 10am on a gameday and I have yet to shotgun is absurd
The dentist told me I have super glue on my teeth. I'm not blaming you I just want to know how that happened
Would you have sex with a guy wearing a Batman mask?
It's all hypothetical, I don't have a Batman mask... yet...
And I just had to awkwardly tell 3 police officers that I was having sex and not in any trouble
Donald Trump and I would be so adorably orange together!
So now I'm lying here in bed taking notes from Teen Mom... I fucked up
You don't know how small your school is until you know everyone in the ER on a Friday night.
I tried to take a cute nude but sneezed halfway through. I sent it anyway
It was an interesting experience to have sex while there was a triathlon going on right outside my bedroom window because it sounded like everyone is cheering for you in bed.
How supportive!
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