they're scary. like turkeys that ate nuclear fucking steroids.
Throwing up while listening to pandora radio. Don't tell me my life doesn't have theme music.
My roommate is on the phone with one of her friends trying to figure out how she threw up IN her pants. I'm not sure whether to burst out laughing or direct her towards Plan B.
If she wants to think that freshman 15 means sleeping with 15 guys than so be it I just gotta make sure I'm one of them.
Btw...pregnancy boobs are amazing. I don't recommend pregnancy in general but the boobs are good.
When hitting a Woodchuck bottle with a machete, glass will fly back and cut your face.
I hope you did not try this.
I think we should bring back the casual nipple tassel
It was like being fucked by the god of thunder, he gained power from the storm. I took a Plan B because I don't think regular birth control will stop Thor's sperm.
How does one chug a beer and swing the bottle at someone in a single motion? This guys a beer ninja man
Hes pre-made beer lollipops so he "can suck before the sex" QUOTE!
Its summer. Time to get to the freshmen before the weight does.
I love the fact that my Mom has been present at 90% of my drug deals.
We smoked a huge blunt and then laid in bed naked eating strawberry shortcake good humor bars. We have the perfect relationship.
Omg no hes gotta go down on me. Then itll be like my vagina has kissed the stanley cup.
dont ever go to laser tag drunk. you will be judged.
Randomize
